Busybody Reports


evil men and seducers shall wax worse and worse, deceiving, and being deceived.

"Hi-de-ho everybody. This is Michael Jay Busybody in the illustrious mansion of Reverend Christian Philanthropic. Thank you Reverend Philanthropic for having me and my listening audience here in your grand estate. Reverend Philanthropic, I've read your book The Power of Giving and I must say I found it informative and exceptionally well written. From what I've seen in your writing, that is, how you expressed the absolute importance of giving over possessing, I expected to find you living in a hovel with but the bare necessities to subsist upon. Instead I find a veritable kingdom of mansions, spectacular grounds, servants and fine automobiles. Could you explain to me and my listening audience the cause of this apparent discrepancy Reverend Philanthropic?"

"Certainly Mr Busybody. It's really quite obvious if you think about it. First of all my good man you must keep in mind that, as I stated in my book, God gives to those who are givers. The more you give, the more you receive. I doubt there is a person or a church who would deny this basic fact since it is spelled out so clearly in the Word. My profession is that of giving. My entire life is devoted to the furtherance and the well-being of others. This being so, I am high on God's list of recipients. Does this not make sense Mr Busybody?"

"I must admit it does make a great deal of sense Reverend Philanthropic. However, a question comes to mind concerning your theory. It would seem to me that being in a position to receive so much, you would then turn around and give that which you had been given away instead of purchasing for yourself even more yachts and airplanes. Is there a link I have somehow missed in my reasoning Reverend Philanthropic?"

"There are limits to everything Mr Busybody. I'm sure you understand this. When our cup runneth over, and we have given away all that can be given, then we must find other ways of disposing of what we receive. Your first words to me were that you expected me to be living the life of a hermit. In fact Mr Busybody, you were not far from wrong. Before I began my business of giving I did indeed live as a beggar on the streets. And if I had my way, I would still be living a life of solitude and humility. But the Lord has not seen fit to allow me this luxury, so I must set aside my desires and suffer the burden of the rich. Do you now understand my position Mr Busybody?"

"I suspect I do Reverend Philanthropic. I only wish I had to bear the burden you endure. This clarified, would it be possible that I might be given a tour of your facilities? I'm sure my listeners would be thrilled to learn what you do here in your tower of giving. And, I must admit, so would I."

"I would be most happy to oblige you with a tour Mr Busybody. And I will be your personal tour guide. Come with me into our chamber of change. Here, as you see, we have a multitude of employees sorting through mail separating the checks from the cash, and distributing the requests for prayer from the orders for religious books and merchandise. It is quite a task that must be undertaken with much diligence. I have three crews who sit at these tables sorting mail twenty four hours a day, seven days a week. And even with all this dedicated effort they are unable to keep up with all the letters and the checks that keep coming in. As I said earlier, it's a great burden that has been placed upon me. A great burden indeed."

"So I see Reverend Philanthropic. I might add that I also see that the location the prayer requests are so delicately placed is a very large trash can. Is that customary practice Reverend Philanthropic?"

"Well, a hem! You see Mr Busybody, one of the requirements for obtaining a job of this nature, that is, the sorting of mail, is that a person must be a very fast prayer warrior. Each letter has been prayed over, that you can be sure of my good man. And contrary to it's appearance, that is not a trash can you see the letters being placed in, but a temporary repository for our most precious objects. Have I helped clear your perspective on our operation Mr Busybody?"

"I believe the picture is becoming more clear as you speak Reverend Philanthropic. Also sir, I see a door with a sign that says Feed the Hungry. Might I inquire what transpires in that room?"

"Why certainly Mr Busybody. Here is where we carry out our most important mission, that of providing aid for the hungry and the needy. This is where we put into circulation the money that has been so generously donated by our many benevolent givers. Please, follow me Mr Busybody."

"I find this most intriguing Reverend Philanthropic. I've often wondered just how such a concern as yours handles the vast wealth that must come your way to provide for the needy. Oh, and I see you also make up Christmas shoe boxes. Now, I must say, that's a nice touch. And you, so busy with the great cares of your possessions and the distribution of all these goods, yet you find time to make up shoe boxes. But Reverend Philanthropic, isn't June a bit early to begin Christmas projects?"

"Yes it is Mr Busybody. However, these are not Christmas boxes as you have supposed them to be. These are supplies for the hungry and needy that we distribute throughout the world. It's a formidable task we've taken on. But through God's help, we are able to endure."

"Um, yes. I see Reverend Philanthropic that your assistants are placing in each of these shoe boxes a toothbrush, a small bottle of aspirin, a candy bar, and a T shirt with your name on it. Does this mean...?"

"Feed the hungry, clothe the naked, and lend medical help where needed. That is our motto Mr Busybody. And that is precisely what we do. I know, it's an awesome responsibility. But somebody has to do it."

"Am I to understand Reverend Philanthropic that the one hundred dollars sent in by your donators purchases a single shoe box of goods for the poor and the needy?"

"Postage is killing us Mr Busybody. Someone should do something about government gouging."

"Well, that being said, I see another door with a sign that says Fulfillment. Might I inquire as to the contents of that room Reverend Philanthropic?"

"Certainly Mr Busybody. Come this way. There, as you see, is our merchandise room where orders are filled."

"Ah, I see Reverend Philanthropic. Thus the Fulfillment room."

"Precisely Mr Busybody. We receive orders for a vast array of goods. Here we have books, plaques, statues, paintings and other such religious paraphernalia that lends comfort and assistance to those seeking spiritual nourishment and guidance."

"Yes, I see. And I notice that, although you are a Christian organization, you also supply Ouija boards and other items of the occult. Isn't that a bit unusual for someone in your position Reverend Philanthropic?"

"The spirit leads people in many directions Mr Busybody. And I find it my responsibility to supply those needs. It is not mine to judge or condemn, but to supply. For myself, I find these abominable. But as I say, who am I to judge? You do understand don't you Mr Busybody?"

"I believe so Reverend Philanthropic. Like a drug dealer who would never use the drugs he sells, but doesn't wish to deprive those who feel so inclined."

"Then you do understand."

"I see yet another room Reverend Philanthropic with a sign that says Spiritual Fulfilment. I take it then that this is your prayer room?"

"Not exactly Mr Busybody. Here, let me introduce you to my spiritual room. As you can see Mr Busybody, this room is for the exclusive use of filling orders for prayer cloths and other such important items that bring one into a close relationship with their Lord. I consider this my top priority room Mr Busybody. It is where I believe I am doing the most for the Christian world."

"Yes, I see. And I see that the people are cutting little pieces off a large bed sheet for prayer cloths to place in the envelopes that will be sent to your donators. Yet, if I understand correctly Reverend Philanthropic, those prayer cloths being purchased are to be taken from your own personal clothing as was that of Peter. Is this not so Reverend Philanthropic?"

"I sleep under a lot of sheets Mr Busybody."

"Oh, I see. And those small chunks of wood that are supposedly authentic pieces of the very cross Jesus died upon, they're being cut from a piece of fire wood. Isn't a thousand dollars a bit high to pay for a tiny sliver of fire wood Reverend Philanthropic?"

"Who says that's fire wood Mr Busybody? And who's to say what happened to the original cross? As far as I or anyone else knows, that piece of log you see might be the incarnation of the very cross Jesus was crucified on."

"I suppose if that's what you want to believe, and if those who feel so inclined to believe it as well... Oh well. Here is a wall with many pictures taped to it. I see pictures of rather ragged sorts. Many of these are elderly people who apparently live a rather destitute life. Am I to take it that these are some of the people you send your shoe boxes to Reverend Philanthropic? I can see they certainly are in need of any help they can get, even though it be small indeed."

"No Mr Busybody. These are not those who we send the packages to. This is my wall of donators, and these are pictures my donators have sent along with their donations. Giving is a very important part of life, and we are told in the Word to give til it hurts. Keep that well in mind Mr Busybody. Keep that in mind."

12Yea, and all that will live godly in Christ Jesus shall suffer persecution. 13But evil men and seducers shall wax worse and worse, deceiving, and being deceived. (2Tim 3:)

26These things have I written unto you concerning them that seduce you. 27But the anointing which ye have received of him abideth in you, and ye need not that any man teach you: but as the same anointing teacheth you of all things, and is truth, and is no lie, and even as it hath taught you, ye shall abide in him. (1John 2:)

22For false Christs and false prophets shall rise, and shall show signs and wonders, to seduce, if it were possible, even the elect. 23But take ye heed: behold, I have foretold you all things. (Mark 13:)

13And the Jews' passover was at hand, and Jesus went up to Jerusalem, 14And found in the temple those that sold oxen and sheep and doves, and the changers of money sitting: 15And when he had made a scourge of small cords, he drove them all out of the temple, and the sheep, and the oxen; and poured out the changers' money, and overthrew the tables; 16And said unto them that sold doves, Take these things hence; make not my Father's house an house of merchandise. 17And his disciples remembered that it was written, The zeal of thine house hath eaten me up. (John 2:)

1But there were false prophets also among the people, even as there shall be false teachers among you, who privily shall bring in damnable heresies, even denying the Lord that bought them, and bring upon themselves swift destruction. 2And many shall follow their pernicious ways; by reason of whom the way of truth shall be evil spoken of. 3And through covetousness shall they with feigned words make merchandise of you: (2Peter 2:)

1And after these things I saw another angel come down from heaven, having great power; and the earth was lightened with his glory. 2And he cried mightily with a strong voice, saying, Babylon the great is fallen, is fallen, and is become the habitation of devils, and the hold of every foul spirit, and a cage of every unclean and hateful bird. 3For all nations have drunk of the wine of the wrath of her fornication, and the kings of the earth have committed fornication with her, and the merchants of the earth are waxed rich through the abundance of her delicacies. 4And I heard another voice from heaven, saying, Come out of her, my people, that ye be not partakers of her sins, and that ye receive not of her plagues. (Rev 18

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